As usual, my alarm goes off at seven in the morning. It's been buzzing for five minutes now. What if, for once, someone brought me a steaming cup of coffee in bed...
I can always dream.
Standing up, I drag myself to the bathroom. Getting out of bed, I grab my phone and check the weather: already 25 degrees. The day is shaping up to be sweltering.
I rush to the dressing room and grab three shirts at random. Let's see... a plain blue one with short sleeves; a green one with a mandarin collar; and a 1970s-style striped T-shirt. I like this one. I grab all three off their hangers and stand in front of the large, slightly tilted full-length mirror. I reveal myself in full, my hair disheveled. I should shave too.
I try on the shirts one after the other.
Laurent: What to choose... and I was going to choose something else?
Robert: Stop! You're not going to hesitate again. Isn't three enough?
Laurent: I don't know... do you think so?
Robert: Choose from these three shirts and I'll grant you one wish.
Laurent: Are you kidding me? Plus, a talking mirror! I really need a coffee right now.
Robert: No, no... please, stay. If you leave, I won't come back to see you until... you're no longer with us.
Laurent: That's not very reassuring.
Robert: What do you want? I'm in high demand. I'm doing you a favor by coming to see you without you asking me.
Laurent: Am I really talking to my mirror?
Robert: Why not? Choose one of these three shirts and see for yourself. Give this product a chance: you won't be disappointed.
Laurent: Well... after all, what's the risk? It's good because it's you, mirror. So... I choose 1970s stripes.
Robert: Excellent choice. Now I can grant your wish. What do you want most in the world?
Laurent: The most in the world?
Robert: Yes. What do you want: money, friends, a great job, family, health...
Laurent: She sounds like my mother. But she would have put health and family first. Although...
Robert: So, what is your wish?
Laurent: Just one wish?
Robert: Yes, just one.
Laurent: Okay. I want…
Robert: Yes ?
Laurent: Let you be my shrink.
Robert: Ah... I didn't expect that. I thought you already had one. But whatever: I'll be your shrink.
Laurent: And how should I summon you for our conversations?
Robert: It's simple: you stand in front of the mirror and say the key, "Oh, Robert, blah blah, blah blah." And we talk.
Laurent:Are you sure it's not more like: "Oh mirror, mirror, tell me if I am the fairest in my kingdom"?
Robert: No, this isn't a fairy tale. And besides, my name is Robert: if you call me anything else, I'll be offended.
Laurent: Besides, you're touchy. That's a weird name for a mirror that does psychoanalysis, Robert... but hey, why not.
Robert: Yes, that's my name. And I'm a psycho-mirror, not some psycho-thingy. You don't choose your role, that's just the way it is.
Laurent: A psycho-mirror named Robert... Are you sure you wouldn't need a shrink too?
Robert: Why? Do you want to become my psycho-human?
Laurent: What's wrong, Robert-mirror! And what else? Although, it would be fun for a writer to recount the adventures of his... how do you say... psycho-mirror. We'll see if you're of any use to me, first.
Robert: Okay. You'll see: I'm very perceptive as a mirror psychologist. I even have a degree. I worked hard for it. Do you want to see my diploma, just to reassure yourself?
Laurent: No need, I'll take your word for it. That's not all, but I have to get back to my work as a novelist. Have a good day, Robert.
Robert: Have a nice day, dear.
Laurent: And could we talk about my novel that never ends?
Robert: If that's what you want. Another time. I'm also expected, another patient... We'll discuss it.
Laurent: It was unexpected to meet you. Why not? See you soon.
Robert: Happy to be of service.
